Margin
6 months ago I didn’t have any. Like zip.
My job was the biggest culprit, although at the time I had just gotten married and was also in the process of buying a house. If I was honest with myself (I certainly wasn’t with most everyone else) I was working in excess of 70-80 hours a week. My job is tough and I was finding my feet. Even having gone through it I still think there was a certain amount of that craziness that I needed to fight through in order to succeed.
I kept hearing the same things from those closest to me, slow down. My good friend Pat Dryburgh put it in as few words as anyone - “When you don’t have the option of taking time off because your workload is so large, take it anyway. If you don’t, you’ll end up chronically ill, depressed, and with a wife that resents you.”
That stuck with me.
My friend and boss, Carey Nieuwhof, also coached me through the phase. Finding margin, he told me, is not only a number one priority for your family life, but it will also help you to succeed at the things you’re passionate about.
My wife, Tracey, was extremely graceful and forgiving.
It was a hard pull. It started with a single day a week, and it was tough. Eventually after a few weeks I was consistently succeeding in battling the “achiever” in me and not working for an entire day. Then I shaved myself back to a five day work week. Then I started managing my working hours that I had set as “work days”. None of it was easy.
I’m starting to feel like I’m on the other side. I’m working much closer to what most would consider a “normal” work week, I treat my wife better and we’re spending more time together, I’m less apt to lose my cool, and ironically even though I’m working less I actually am accomplishing more.
Margin and time management has allowed me to take a step back and evaluate my job more subjectively. I am moving forward faster, and on more projects than I ever have to date, and in less time. For the first time since starting my job I really feel as thogh I’m working less “in it” and more “on it”.
Thank you Tracey.
Thank you Pat.
Thank you Carey.
You guys are really, really awesome.
